Chocolate Orgasm

So i'm like, doing the low-carb thing again, cuz like, my pants don't like, fit, and so like, i lost a pound the first day.  And so i'm, like, eating some chicken and guacamole and Greek yogurt right now with some cashews, like, thrown in the mix for a little, like, crunch.

And i'm like, NOT thinking about chocolate.  Like, not at all.  Chocolate?  What's that?  I don't even know what that is.  That brown stuff?  That looks like, like, something that came out of a sheep's butt?  And smells like it, too? 

Okay, no, it doesn't look or smell like sheep excrement.  It's yummy and divine and makes me want to (almost) believe there's a god, and the mouth-feel...ooooh that creamy, smooth texture (you won't know of what i speak if all you've ever had is cheap chocolate, sorry) and the little burst of endorphins that wash over me as i take that first bite, like my whole body, my whole being just basking in the euphoria, the floaty, happy feeling of...mmmmmmmm, chocolate. 

No, i don't miss it at all.

Oh holy hell on a kaiser roll, how am i going to do this?