Haiku for Menopause

I wake up soaking
Like i just climbed from a pool
Eff off, menopause

Craaavings and Minnow Paws and { Labor Day }

I know i've mentioned in prior posts that perimenopause sucks. I would now like to upgrade that statement to:

Menopause sucks!

It's like an evile combination of PMS and pregnancy:  mood swings, fatigue, hot flashes, sore boobs (sorry you had to read that, Chris), and wild cravings. 

This morning for breakfast i had a bowl of black beans mixed with alfredo sauce and topped with fried eggs.  That sounds very reasonable to me, but Allie freaked out at my putting alfredo sauce in the beans.  If she only knew some of the other foods i've been craving and eating lately.  I'll have to start posting recipes. 

On another note, do you know the origins of Labor Day?  It's really freaky!  I'm totally freaked out right now.  Go see!  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labor_Day

Medical Crapstain

This year (while only paying a third of our mortgage) we paid off my medical bills, which were in the thousands.  We have crap for insurance.  And we pay over $500/month for it.  And in July it's going up to over $600/month.  And the July after that, it will go up to over $700/month.  We will have been forced to cancel it long before then.

I just ordered Allie's type 1 diabetes supplies (including the insulin that keeps her alive) to the tune of $1,400 for a 3-month supply.  Luckily, she's still on her dad's insurance which is better than mine and Todd's.  But what will happen when she's out of school? 

Will she have to fork out $466 EVERY SINGLE MONTH to keep herself alive?  Is that the future kids with type 1 have to look forward to?  Will she find a job with great insurance?  

These are just a few of the things that keep me up at night, along with my difficulty-swallowing issue that's been going on for endless months now.  Did I mention I went to the doc for that?  He said it was probably from stress, and that I probably had acid reflux disease from the extreme stress as well. 

I broke down yesterday and started taking Prilosec (OMG I just turned 40 and I'm already on meds!) and guess what?  My stomach feels better already and it's marginally easier to swallow.  Can't wait to see how much better I feel after the 2-week course of proton pump inhibitors.  (Doesn't that sound cool?)

Now can they just come up with a cure for stress? 

Toe Massacre

Okay, excuse the lack of pedicure; I have been neglecting my feet lately. I guess now I'm forced to give them (or at least the right one) a little love.

So I was in the shower last night and I slipped and fell. Yes, I'm like 74 years old, okay? Anyway, my toe got mangled under the metal dealy that catches water at the bottom of the shower door. It's broken, for sure. It hurts. But it's just more embarrassing than anything else. Todd, between bouts of concern, got in a few snickers.

Toes are such ugly things!

Doctor, Doctor, Gimme the News

I'm trying really hard to see the sunny side, seriously, I am. But it's only 10:15 a.m. and the day already sucks.

7:30 a.m. doctor appointment for me: a follow-up to get test results. Not good. Ultrasound showed I have something called "hydrosalpinx" of the left fallopian tube. This can mean 1 of 4 different things, one of which was a rare form of cancer. So of course now I'm scared that that's what it is. Following up with Gyn in a week-point-five. The healthy thing would be to NOT WORRY about it until I know for sure what's going on. Unfortunately, I'm not healthy in that way.

So I get home at 8:05 a.m. from my doc and Zane is sorting through some of my costume jewelry to wear to school for Switch Day. He finds an old silver ring, very tarnished and I tell him to polish it with a silver polishing cloth. He pulls a cloth out from the dispenser, but 2 come out, so he pokes one back in with his finger. OOPS! Finger is now stuck in VERY rigid plastic prongs and when he tries to pull the finger back out, they chew into his finger angrily.

Crap.

I look for something sharp to cut the prongs with, which is going to be difficult since they're so tight on his finger. Scissors aren't sharp enough. I'm afraid to try my box cutter. Zane is yowling in pain.

Off to Urgent Care we go (which is right next door to the doc I had just come from). We get there at 8:45; it doesn't open 'til 9.

We sit. We wait. We worry. We pace before the door. The nurse/receptionist sees us and lets us in and takes a good look at Z's finger.

By the time we get inside and present payment, Zane's finger is BLUE/GRAY. The doc still hasn't arrived.

Doc arrives at 9 and we go back around 9:01. Doc pulls out some heavy duty cutters and within a couple minutes, Zane's blue finger is free. Doc keeps us there to make sure the finger regains circulation. Checks his pulse-ox a couple times. Gives him Tylenol. Tells us a funny story about his little brother who once got his HEAD stuck in a similar fashion. Hehehe. Not funny, but hehehehe.

We take Allie to school and Zane comes home with me. He can't write with the finger, anyway, so what the heck. He's a little traumatized. I'm a little traumatized.

And now I have to spend the day trying to get my deadline work done before I take Allie to the eye doc at 4.

Where's the freaking CALGON and how soon can it take me away?