These photos were taken in the tiny apartment where the kids and I lived when we first moved to Arizona five years ago (summer of 2003). It's sooooo funny to look back on those. I've been looking at my "skinny" pix lately. I'm about 15 pounds heavier now, and despite extremes in working out, I am hanging steady at 115 lbs. My body is different. There's more muscle, admittedly, but there's more fat, too. I need my wedding bands resized. It's effort to get them on, but getting them back off involves lots of soap and tearing of skin.
I always wondered how I would feel when this day came. You know, the day you realize time and gravity and genetics have finally caught up with you. Where I stand (or, if I'm being honest, sit) it looks like this: I can either 1) accept that my body is different now and like it, or 2) starve myself and work against nature to regain my skinniness.
Number 2 doesn't sound healthy, honestly. I mean, even if it just involved eating more salads and fewer desserts. Obsessing over appearance is really embarrassing and I refuse to be one of those people.
I think I'll go make a carrot cake and do my favorite work out. Only things that make me happy are allowed in my life!
And yes, the skinny pictures can stay. They don't make me sad. I'm not lamenting for days gone by. Life is good, even 15 lbs heavier.
The kids are still silly, so not everything changes.
4 holla'd back:
Haha wowee! Time the weirdest thing I know in the whole universe even japan. It goes by way to fast and leaves you wondering: What ever happen to skinny hippie moms and tie-dye shirts?
embrace it.
you are still totally fit and fabulous. besides. happy in a good marraige plus a baby. is better than skinny and single right? right.
look at all you've gained along with the 15 lbs. and did you know having a 3rd kids alters your body forever, those gut muscles can never recover. even for the skinniest of people. at least that is my theory. i have to send you the best work out video. it's awesome.
You must be a tiny girl anyway! I think I weighted 115 in 8th grade. My skeleton probably weights 115. Possibly one thigh weighs 115. I could go on and on.
I love that only things that make you happy are allowed in your life! It's true, there's just not enough time to waste on things that only add worry and stress.
Get used to it, fatty, you're closer to 40 than 30 these days...lol!
Seriously, 115 lbs??? I eat that much meat during Thanksgiving week...You have to look at it this way: compare yourself and your looks to your peers of the same age...now that will give you A LOT of confidence...I know it does for me because everyone I compare to (especially in America) is a big fat ass while I am (and you are) in shape....if anything, a couple of extra lbs is good: white girls with big booties are all the rage these days!
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